MY BLACK GOTH.

Saturday, December 31, 2005

2:49 PM

Green Day
Boulevard Of Broken Dreams

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
and I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line
Of the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's alright
Check my vital signs
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah
Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I walk alone
I walk a...

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone...

luv tis song...

gonna b school reopen soon le. tho i carn wait to c how my juniors r like i seriously dowan lesson sia. lolz, HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE OUT THERE!!!!

n have a great dog yr! :)

muakks,
L!L!N
aka kitty?!

i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

6:42 PM

wahh today really v mad lor. esp e weather. so crazy larh. i duno wad's wif mi today, wth. juz nw when we were having parade rehearsal i seuddenly felt so dizzy lor, like gonna faint lydat. then end up i kept falling out. then according to my squadmates, when i rejoined em again later, i was 'rocking'. (shouldnt it b swaying?) nvm, not e subject of discussion. neway as i was saying abt the weather. during e bl**dy parade rehearsal (unnecessary), e sun was so damn hot! i was like, urgh, when's this gonna end?? then we kept marching here n there n then those trcs kp crapping non stop. i cldnt even focuz on wad they were saying lor, wtf. then i was juz standing there staring at nothing. i wanted to occupy my mind so i wun feel like fainting so much but i cldnt lor! it's like, my mind was a complete blank. nothing i cld tink of. then after tt after lunch, when e weather was altho still v sunny but not too bad liao rite, it juz had to rain!!! i mean, i have totally NOTHING against the rain, i LOOOOOVE it, but tt meant tt we cannot drill nemore lor. we did 1 procedure, n apparently i looked like a penguin while saluting on e march. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I LOOK LIKE LOR! then i tried correcting myself but like, totally no use. o n i was also too slow. but i dun realize it lehx. then in my opinion larh, i tot we did a most HORRIBLE procedure. urgh. the second one was so shuang3. *sighz* cuz of e rain. make it so cooling. i dun mind doing drill in e rain lor! it's so much better than doing in e sun. but senior dun let so end u we go n do fa case.

e case for e sec 3s(STILL CARN GET USED TO US BEING SEC 2S LE!!) i n ys were e casualties. haha, i was 'his' 'mother'. ah... e sec 3s reassurance so damn good lor. i tot they did v well. ok lah, abit bad larh but on e whole it's actually real good de. then our turn rite? i 'killed' e casualty. y? cuz i gave her cpr when she had heartbeat. wth u probably dunno wad shit im toking about larh so nvm. juz wanna say:

TODAY SUCKED

blahdy-blah,

L!L!N

aka kitty?!(lolz)

i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;

Thursday, December 15, 2005

7:24 PM

Y'knw wad? They're shit, pure shit. heyy wad's their problem, man? it' juz nail polish. black nail polish but hey, black's juz a color for hell's sake! o correction, black's not even a COLOR. n she wants me 2 wipe everyting off or i can "forget about going out anymore". fine, so i wipe it off. and "you better throw it away or give it away or you *threat*". like i'd throw it away! it costs $2!! n $2 can buy me alot of things. ah yes, n apparently: "It's not that i dun allow you to wear black nail polish... but black brings bad luck to the family! you dun want your dad to lose his business rite? be a good girl lah, and lissen 2 me. use pink or red lah. that's the proper color that innocent(yeah rite) girls use. not black or brown or green or blue. i didn't allow you to go out wif ur frenz to learn this kind of ah-lian ting. and that tatoo ah. u want put, put it somewhere i cant see! put on your wrist for wad?" *pause* *resumes nagging -> change of topic* "and you go out n train ah. train wad? u go training or shopping opne? etc.etc.etc."
She's seriously amusing, dun u tink so? only will-power kept me from rushing out to the corridor and leaping off the building there and then. red n pink r e proper colors tt INNOCENT girls use huh? yea,yea, innocent, ha! rrrrrite. so cldn't she have juz told me rite at the start when she noticed my black nails tt black was an unlucky color before instead of after freaking out? i cld have juz accepted it! instead of screaming(well, not literally). and tat tatoo she was referring to happens to be juz TEMPORARY. one rub and bye-bye to it. plus if my memory didn't fail me, im quite sure that 8 yrs ago, it was my mum hu 'introduced' me to temp tatoos. my first tatoo as i rmb, was a 50 cent sized cute, colorful, bright flower. and EXCUSE ME, im still using flowers and butterflies. im not using skulls and daggers. or scorpions and spiders. or dragons and hearts wif arrows. or pixies and ghouls. hell, e only designs i use r FLOWERS AND BUTTERFLIES! like the red and yellow one i currently have on my wrist. so how come she didn't yell at me 8 yrs ago, huh?
PLUS, she wants to know EVERYTHING. like if i tok online:
- hu r u toking to huh?
-is tt a guy or a girl?
-y u use short form?
-wad r u toking abt?
-do i knw tis person?
-*takes down class/cca foto* which one izzit?

who she tink she is?? my MUM?! o, wait, she is my mum. *playback* hu she tink she is?! the police?! i mean, yea, sure, paretns have the rite to know wad's going on in their childrens' lives but NOT TO THE XTEND OF INTERROGATING THEM!
esp if im toking to a guy (hu happens to b coincidentally not in the fotos):
-hu is he?
-wad's his name?
-do i knw him?
-is he nice?
-does he tok about *toot*?
-u better b careful hor!
-does he try to *toot*?
-how old is he?
-is he in ur class?
-hw does he look like?
-have i seen him before?
it's almost as if she wants to go to his hse or find him n bash him up for actually daring to talk to me! sheesh. i better not get a bf in e future. for his safety n my sanity. ah forget it, i dun give a damn nemore. so long as im not commiting murder/crime/arson, im......sane!
P.S( im NOT getting rid of tt tatoo! it's too pretty!! note: PRETTY)

GOOD RIDDANCE.

i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;

Monday, December 12, 2005

8:47 PM

i really never noticed tt i was vulgar. i mean, alittle larh, but, not so serious rite? but i definitely knw im very violent. lolz. aiya hu cares. newae, i tink relationships r a total n complete waste of time. very unnecessary n completely stupid! y'knw wad? e whole process rite, consists of:
-crush
-like each other
-get together
-hold hands
-hug
-kiss
-quarrel
-girl cry
-boy roll eyes
-(majority of e time) break up

abit diao~ lor. n when u really love sm1 tt much, e moment u break, ur heart really shatters. im not speaking frm experience obviously but i've read enuff books n seen enuff tv n heard enuff sob-stories frm some of my frenz. n if the feeling still lasts long after everyting is long overm, tt's when it'll really hurt u. a lot. tt's y ill never ever get myself into a relationship unless i really feel tt much for tt person. which i never will. i guess. *shrug* i dun really know much about love i suppose. ppl say u muz experience it all before u really knw e taste of it. but im afraid of it. not exactly afraid, but more of.... apprehensive? ah well, like i said, ill juz wait n c wad's in e future.

i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;