Thursday, February 23, 2006
9:54 PM
I am now going to talk in standard English. Mrs. Woon’s class has influenced me to be a better speaker and also to be a person who strives for the whole world to speak in perfect English and not in the horrendous Singlish which really, just drives me nuts listening to it. Such a beautiful language’s image like English should not be marred by certain people who speak such… Disgusting language. I absolutely LOATHE these people… not. Eh come on larh, singlish is our Singapore the trademark lor. Cannot anyhow want then dun use liao lor. Or try to get rid of it de larh. Pls larh, u try as hard as u can oso sure cannot stop urself from saying de lor. One good example wld b my classmate clarine lor. She try to sms me in standard English but sadly(even tho im not sad at all lor), she failed. *EVIL CACKLE* muahaha. Ok larh, I nd go study my physics liao. Haven done my maths ws(cuz it’s in sch), my maths correction(cuz I dunno how do) n my humanities journal(cuz I’ve no idea how or wad to write).
Then agn, I decided to post somemore. What did I do today? Nothing. Listen to the trcs down there tok tok tok non stop de. Then their voices so melodious, like lullaby lydat. Can make ppl slp one. Y’knw, recently I cant slp lor. Mayb if I tape their voice down can help me. Wad m I crapping huh? Nvm. Thn today pepe lend me her JJ Lin CD. So scared of her sia… she cares a lot about her cd. =X I was panicking the whole day. Wondering if I would accidentally scratch the cd cover or something. It’s not bad larh. I like his eng songs better. I GOT A DADDY N A STEP-MUMMY LERH!! *cheers* ok, nxt topic. too confusing liao so dun wanna toka abt it. heex.
Went mac wif shuying today. thn saw haiwei, iris, clivia n shaun there too. o ya, n chris. So dumb lor! She nd go toilet mah. So she ask me help her buy food first. Then she say: help me buy one ‘medium fries and vanilla cone’. I tot she said vanilla COKE n I was standing there wondering wth she was toking abt since mac oready got no vanilla coke liao for heaven’s sake. Then I go to e cashier and said: can I have a medium fries and a vanilla coke”? and the cashier was staring at me like im some lunatic lydat can. So paiseh lor! Thn I RAN to the toilet and yelled for shuying: ARE YOU SURE YOU WAN VANILLA COKE?! Only to find out that she wanted vanilla CONE not COKE. Wth. I feel so dumb. Thn the stupid cashiers were laughing at me. Fine lor, I stupid can. Budden hor. Not only is I hear wrongly, shuying oso nvr say clearly mah. So as quoted from her: “negative + negative = positive”. Haha.
Seriously hor… I tink I better go study liao. Even tho I oready studied liao. But it’s better to study more. Really dun wanna fail larh. =S
Bb,Kitty~
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Monday, February 20, 2006
8:01 PM
sad... today so damn suay de. first clarine happily decided to drown me when we were jumping into e deep pool. she decided to pull me down into the water wif her when i was trying to swim up. causing me to swallow mouthfuls of water. YUCK. she hates me. XD lucky e coach jump in n pull me up.nxt, when i was attempting to do a pull up, eileen kindly offered to help push me up. end up leh... she pull my legs backwards. i lost my grip. i fell. ON MY TUMMY. resulting in: a bruise on my right palm, a BIG bruise n alot of cuts on my right knee and an abrasion wound on my left knee. n a traveling ache. which is currently residing at my butt. :( forget it...ow,kitty~
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Sunday, February 19, 2006
5:26 PM
i miss u. i really do. i miss the old u. i wanna go back in time. back to the days when we played together. u were my sis. we were sisters. 'sisters forver' we used to say. but u've changed. we dun even TALK much now. it's always juz 'hi', 'yea, hi' now. u used to b so sweet, so cute, so pretty. not that ur no longer pretty, ur prettier in fact. u were always more outgoing than me i know. no, i was more outgoing than u in the past. even tho i called u 'jie', well, u ARE older than me. by a month? heh. we used to play so many games together. i was always the peacemaker between u n our playmate. ok im not going to mention her name here. but u've changed! u've seriously changed! we were best frenz. the 3 of us. thn it became 2. u left. since when was the sweet happy ***** i knew so boy-crazy (not that im not) XD? since when did she change a bf every dunno how many days? since when did she put on make-up? since when did she dress like some, some... oh i dunno! since when did she injure herself juz cuz of a guy?? i kp repeating this: i miss u. i miss the old u, really. we can't even find a common topic to talk about now! i wanna b close frenz agn. i wanna b sisterrs agn. but we can nvr be. cuz we're too different now. u've always prefered dressing in clothes with like, no sleeves? i didn't care, we didn't care. even tho i was more 'conservative' than u. haha. ur scaring me, jie. y did u do that? nobody told me, i didn't know until i read ur blog. i was so shocked. even if u didnt feel the pain i felt it for u. we haven talked properly in wad? 7 years? u started going 'havoc' in p4. u already had a BF in p4. we started drifting apart. but when *ahem* passed away, we cried together again. we became as close in the past. then all of a sudden u drifted away agn. i wanted to hold on to u but u let go. i didn't know what to do. so i let go too. we both drifted seperate ways. i nvr really saw u agn. when i did see u i cldnt recognise u. u've changed so much. i rmb wad u said to me in the past.when we were little u used to tell me when i cried: dun cry. we'll stick together always ok? thn slowly, all the warm comforting things u said turned to: fine, ur studies r better than me. even my papa also say so. i dun like u! i cried for the whole day when u said that. i was so upset. but we made up after that. altho i could sense that u were not the same animore. i dun tink u rmb it anymore, i seriosly doubt so. i rmb the times we had together. we had so much fun. so much innocent fun. y did u change? y did u change so much?? i guess some things cant b helped. n it's no use even if i say this cuz i didn't give u my url. u cant read this. i dun wan u to newae.im not gg to say anting animore. it's useless, fruitless. i miss u, jie. i really do. i wanna go back to the days when we were all sisterrs. when we didn't have a care in the world. when all us neighbours played together like we were siblings. i miss those days. but dun forget, even if u hate me, ill always luv u as my sis. hugg.
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Saturday, February 18, 2006
4:35 PM
i've adapted to stella's way of 'cooling down'. keke. dun really wanna talk about what happened lor. so nvm. i'll try as hard as i can, though im pretty sure there wun be much difference.
Honestly, I don’t know who to trust. Maybe I said I trusted certain people. But I don’t think I trust them to the full. Too many things have happened in the past. i trusted too much in the past. i trusted the wrong people. and i regret it. Don’t ask me to fight my instinct. I really can’t. I just drift away when I get too close. Neither can I forget anything. Even though I can pretend to forgive and forget about the thing, laugh over it even, I never do forget it. in fact, (dun freak), I will harbor a certain… dislike for that person. If that’s the way to describe it that is.
Memories. Memories are hard to erase. They’re not like the files you have in your computer which when you get sick of seeing, you can just click the delete button and they’re gone. Especially bad memories. They’re like viruses. Which hit your comp and make the whole system collapse. For every happy memory, I guess I have 2 unhappy ones. Or maybe I don’t. Maybe I only started keeping the bad memories instead of throwing them out into the rubbish bin last year. I’ve changed a lot. I think. Even my ex-classmate says so. She asked me why I was so cold towards her. Was I? I didn’t realize it. She asked me why I had suddenly turned so quiet, so cold when we had gone out with the rest of our ex-classmates. Those ex-classmates were the ones which I used to hang out with, to exchange secrets with. Everything has changed.
Trust. Trust is something that needs to be built up over time. Still, it takes just a few words or sentences to collapse. It’s just like a building. You need a strong foundation, a strong base and the material you use to build it up needs to be strong too. If the cement is still wet, you can easily leave a dent in it. It’s not going to take just a short time to mend that dent. It’s no use. When the building is filled with many dents and cracks, it’s going to be very easy for it to crumble. Just like trust.
Hold a minute, what the hell m I crapping about?? R u confused? That’s alright, im confused to. So don’t ask me to trust someone unless you can find someone for me to trust. Dotz. Nvm, change of subject…
aniwae, so happy. XD my dad got a me a tv!!! n now i got a webcam/mic. *cheers* didn't really know what was going on at first cuz when i stepped into my room i saw a new cupboard there n juz stood there staring at it for a moment before my dad came in and said: oh tt's for ur new tv. ok, that actually made me stare at him even more. then i saw this new oven/warmer/griller/toaster on e kitchen table. thn when it was time for dinner, i was sorta overjoyed cuz i wanted 2 try melting cheese and pouring it over my vege. but i didn't know what to pur e cheese in. my mum 'cleverly' handed me a tupperware meant for MICROWAVE ovens and said: nah, this 1 sure can one larh. even tho i was sorta sceptical, i still put it in..... only to find.... THAT THE STUPID THING MELTED. the tupperware i mean, not the cheese. so my mum had to wipe the melted plastic of the new ting. n it stank. of melted plastic. :( so dumb. found out that my parents had gone on a little 'shopping spree' to courts. lol. no wonder they bought somany 'electronic gadgets'. *grins*bye,kitty~ps: there, pepe n bunny, i've updated.
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
10:46 PM
i know im pathetic u dun have to tell me that. it's not doing us any good but i juz feel like moaning about it. im not moaning about it to u m i? if i happen to b, juz tell me. i wld appreciate it. dun read my blog then. fyi, im NOT trying to trick u like someone so u wun fall for aniting. dun worry.
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Monday, February 13, 2006
9:17 PM
ohman, i realized tt i spent 20 over bucks on v-day prezzies. how nice can i get? jkjk. i bought chocs for our whole class... n oso some other stuff. luv Abz. XD aniwaes, juz wanna wish everybody a...HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!!have a romantic day tmr...*grins*LUV,kitty~
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Saturday, February 11, 2006
1:51 PM
chain mails r irritating, that statement i definitely agree with. but some chain mails are actually very meaningful. take for example, this one:Have you ever wondered which hurts the most?Saying something and wishing you hadn't? or Saying nothing and wishing you had?I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them.If you do, they might break your heart...if you don't, you might break theirs.Have u ever decided not 2 become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person?Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't.You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own........when you least suspect it, or when you don't even want it at all.Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you?Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle?We tell lies when we are afraid... AFRAID OF WHAT WE DON'T KNOW, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us.But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.Life is all about RISKS and it requires you to jump.Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done, or could have had.* What would you do if every time you fell in love you had to say good-bye?*What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there?*What would you do if your best friend DIED TOMORROW and you NEVER GOT to tell them how you felt? (even if it is that you don't care anymore)*What would you do if you LOVED someone more than ever and you COULDN'T have them?*What would you do if you never got the CHANCE to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I love them?*People live, BUT PEOPLE DIE. I want to tell you that you are a friend. If you died tomorrow (God Forbid)you would bein my heart.Would I be in yours? You might be BEST FRIENDS one year, PRETTY GOOD FRIENDS the next year, DON'T TALK THAT OFTEN the next, and DON'T WANT TO TALK AT ALL the year after that. but at the end, you're still my friend.so maybe i used to think that way in the past. so maybe i already changed my mindset but i really think this is sorta meaningful.'we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all'that's what im afraid of now. certain people don't notice when they hurt others. they think nothing is wrong. and the hurt people don't want to say anything so the certain people have no idea what had gone wrong and go on as if nothing has happened. although to them the friendship remains normal, to the hurt person, a hole has appeared. a hole which nothing can fill up again. once again im back to the topic of friendship. i don't want to talk about it any longer. nothing makes sense to me anymore.InCoMpLeTe,kitty~
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Friday, February 10, 2006
12:12 PM
ohboy, being sick is SO horrible... *sniff* initially only got sore throat n flu. then suddenly got fever ytd. until this morn thn no more fever to b replaced by cough. FEVER!!!!!! COME BACK!!!!! =X as in, i rather have fever than cough. so xin ku one u knw. so sad lor ytd they make COOKIES. BUTTER cookies. n i din get to make thm. :( hu ask me sick. stupid stupidstupidstupid. HOW THE HELL DID I GET SICK INT HE FIRST PLACE?! i was like so fine half the day on wed. until after the interview tingy thn i start sneezing n tot i got flu. but went for training pretending tt there was nothing wrong. until i really buay tahan. thn go home like not feeling well. thn my throat felt like i juz swallow glass or something. SO PAIN! i practically CHOKED down my food. thn ytd whole day wan slp oso cannt slp. felt so cold lor. but when i cover myself with the blanky i felt so hot. thn i take off. thn v cold so i put back. but still hot. so i take off. thn cold agn. end up i gave up n put a sweater. last nite practically din slp e whole nite lor. bloody stubborn nose was clogged up. still clogged up. thn ppl kp telling me 'BREATHE THRU UR MOUTH!' but when i breathe thru my mouth i kp coughing. n thn i try in vain to breathe thru my nose. so it's like: breathe. coughcoughcough. snufflesnuffle. breathe. coughcoughcough. snufflesnuffle. ive given up. i shall hold my breathe till i die of suffocation. wah liao today promo day leh!!!! i cant go!!! scarly i din get promoted. so excited oso no use. :( dun tink ill get promoted newae so hu cares. thn tmr actually wan go swimming at my hse here e safra with xy, clarine n yiling de. now i no nd go le lor. fuck. pardon me for being so vulgar. cant stand it animore. everything tastes so tasteless n ive got no appetite. the nxt time u c me ill probably b as thin as a stick. ok, im originally thin as a stick. nvm. went to see e doc agn today to get another mc. cuz e original mc i got only cover ytd. actually wanted go sch today. but my parents protest. doc oso protest. so end up cannot go lor.bought 3 new cds when i was waiting for my turn at e doc. 3 for $10. i tink they shld b quite old le bah.*BackstreetBoys greatest hits - chapter II*Best Fantastic Females 2005*The Greatest Love Of Allmy classmates probly having Lang Arts now. poor tings. thn agn, i cld b one of them. this song's sorta nice.... 'we've got it going on'. la dee da... my throat. my nose. my head. my body. wtf. they all ache. n hurt like siao. forget it. bye everybody... im gg for my lunch now.jia you 2A, for the noticeboard, our tree's beginning to look more like a tree. *cheers* -.- pepe dun worry too much bout it kaes. like i said ur doing great as a welfare head. :))byekitty~
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Monday, February 06, 2006
9:14 PM
did i really look very upset today? how come so many people ask me i today izzit very sad... lolz. probably just tired. and stressed. took neoprints with Clarine, Shu Hui and Yi Ling today. the welfare ppl of our class stayed back today to decorate the class noticeboard. wonder how it looks like... izzit really nice? lolz. with pepe heading the welfare committee i guess it SHOULD be. unless they postponed it again. *shrug* im copying down the lyrics to 'Yes I Love You' by S.H.E now so bbz... sorry so short post. nothing to crap about or complain about larh.kitty~IVE BEEN INFLUENCED BY MY SURROUNDING PEOPLE! IM READING MANGA! *gasp* IM SINGING!! *double gasp* IM WATCHING ANIME (hunter x hunter)! *triple gasp* *pause*OMG~ *faints*-.-valentine's day is coming, people.... n so is Haiwei's bdae. =X
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Sunday, February 05, 2006
12:49 PM
specifically to pepe: dun be too upset about what happened. things like that happen all the time. one of my pri school teachers cited that i was one of her best students and that she would forever remember me when she left to go to another school but when i bumped into her on a bus 2 years later, she didn't even give me a second glance. it was either she forgot who i was or i bumped into her twin. and it's definitely not the latter reason. so dont think too much about it. happy moments never last. neither do 'frenz'.like my new song everybody? it rawks. it's 'May I Love You' by Zhang Zhi Cai. if im not wrong. i'm totally obsessed with it. Lolz. here are e lyrics:我要如何才能拥抱你呢紧紧抱着我吻你你附和从朋友晋升情人角色从苦涩转变成了快乐把钥匙交给了你你却转身将我囚禁在一扇叫做等待的门里你试过那么多心的锁怎么就不来开启我的爱情love you, love you, may i love you?tell me what to do 才能让你不孤单我不孤独一起找幸福当这个世界一步一步华丽到荒芜请放心我还是你的信徒love you, love you, may i love you?tell me you love me too 我可以继续付出付出就够我满足不相信爱情对我永远(的)残酷我奢望时间会为我祝福看着我这样投入难道你都没有感触不接受至少给我些帮助就说你感动到想哭多少能减轻一点我的痛苦nice rite? of cuz, i like it wad. lolz, jkjk. bye and enjoyy!kitty~
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
8:47 PM
I'm going to say it one last time. If i say i don't like someone, please believe me. TRUST me. I really DON'T like that person anymore. I know the person who keeps not believing me doesn't come here much but just for her info, in case she does come.
Anyway, i realized that im a good actress. Either that or i'm seriously a hypocrite. you be the judge. i could actually smile through the whole day and act happy-happy when i wasn't. At all, thank you, i know i'm pro. Why do i bother pretending to be happy when i'm not? y do i try to smile when i cant? aiya wadever larh, tok so lame stuff for what....
SMILE EVERYONE! SMILEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
kitty~
p.s short post today but not really in the mood to post. sry. not tt anybody reads my blog? -.-
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
