somebody rip my heart out & leave me here to bleed;
I was eating my dinner. My parents were sitting at the table. I stared at my father, then shifted my gaze to my mother. She was busy cutting up meat; he was eating fruits. The whole table was silent. Guess what I did? I started studying them, and trying to figure out what genes I got from them. I realized, that I've never looked at their faces this carefully before. As cliche as the following sentence sounds, I still have to say it. I never even realized how fast time passed and how much older they've grown. It scares the hell out of me to even think of the day when they both decide that they'd be better off and happier living in a place way too far for me to even think about visiting. Unless of course I decide to stand in the way of a speeding car with an underaged smartass who's drink-driving.
Here's what I gathered:
My character is disturbingly like my father. I hate it when people disturb me when I'm busy; I am horribly temperamental; I go so quiet at times that I don't even exist; I loathe people who cancel appointments at last minutes and people who're late; I abhor it all the more when I'm the one who's late; I like sleeping very very late; I rather walk away than create a messy fuss out of everything in an argument. I got his height (which I'm thankful for, actually); I got his er... nothing else.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, I seem to have gotten the neatness bug from my mother. I feel like screaming my lungs out when people don't replace things in their original positions; I get irked even when the silliest, most insignificant things occur - like a blue file appearing in the middle of my orange files, a storybook appearing amongst my textbooks or even stupider, a pen facing the opposite direction from the other pens in my pencilcase; I can say one thing but mean another all the time; I act tough (don't give me that incredulous look). I got her eyes! :D I got her nose but I got her thick thighs too. ):
I'm just wondering... Will I remember these attributes 10 years from now? Good, you just wasted your time away reading my blog. Now, be a good kid and run off to study. Playtime's over. Meanwhile, I'll continue my random ramblings.
I had this sudden urge to blog about 2 hours ago when I was at the library. I wanted to blog about my burst of productiveness yesterday where I spent 2 hours at the library doing my homework and STUDYING MY REDOX NOTES for the first time because I knew nuts about it in the first place. Why? Because I don't pay attention in lectures that's why. I wanted to blog about eating 8 tomatoes (raw) in 3 days; and having the things in my room shifted around for the 3rd time this week. I wanted to blog about numbers, for some warped reason - a reason which I don't have the slightest idea what it is. I wanted to blog about the 9 books I read in 3 days. And I wanted to blog about a series called SEVENS by Scott Wallens.
Well I changed my mind. I mean, I still mentioned them so I did blog about them anyway. I don't want to go anywhere near the fking dais tomorrow. I don't want to shout a fking command to the whole fking to school for them to fking get into a sediya position. Alright I'm just getting a case of the jitters. I refuse to prepare a speech. I'll make an impromptu one if I have to. Yees, speak slower so time becomes real tight and they can't squeeze me into the slot before everybody is dismissed. :D
That's all.
-Li Lin
P.S: Bottled Up by Jaye Murray is a very good book - about as good as This Lullaby (Sarah Dessen) and Invisible (Pete Hautman).
P.P.S: LLM you shit-faced, menopausing arsewipe. I rather fail my physics than have you as my permanent teacher. That's how much I hate you.
i could spend my life in this sweet surrender;